Done with the first day of performance with PAPA 2013!
I made a few observations and reflections:
1) The way the actual performance went seemed to reaffirm the rough theory in my mind. The theory: Usually there will be many hiccups, technical faults, mistakes and all sort of problems during rehearsals/practices. However, no matter how bad they are, when it comes to the actual day itself, everything seems to fall into place naturally; people involved will give their 110% (due to their adrenaline rush).
Somehow and somewhat things will turn out well. I must say I had this thought in my mind during the rehearsals themselves, and I seemed to felt rather indifferent and chill about problems that occurred as I always thought they will be resolved somehow on the actual day.
Okay, this theory might hold because the people involved took the effort to correct and resolve all those problems they encounter creatively, just that they might not be obvious to the outside observer. So, it is not so “naturally” everything falls into place.
2) Now I understand that 110% efforts (or any other effort >100%) does exist. Yes it may not make sense, but in reality it does happen. People just find that extra bit in them to perform very well on D-day itself.
3) PAPA might have seemed like a waste of time, it still may be. However, I realised it is sort of a positive distraction as well. It provided me with a “getaway” of some sorts; allowing me to be in another world, totally focusing on PAPA itself and nothing else for most parts of the day. The other concerns in my life seemed to have been pushed away.
Initially I did not feel much togetherness within the props team itself. But now I do. I could feel the sense of common purpose and camaraderie amongst us.
Of course, once PAPA ends, the reality will hit me once again, and I will start learning to adapt and grasp with it. Another period of transition awaits.
4) Emotions triumph reason in decision-making. I realised that most of my decisions recently are mainly made by emotions, rather than by rational reasoning. For some reason, although I tried to think rationally or I would like to think I actually did, after the decision has been made, I realised that it was actually a product of my emotions.
Sometimes my emotions would just lead me, although I know that it might not be the best course of action. I told myself not to get too emotionally involved in it, but my emotions just won’t cooperate. So it remains to be seen where this mix of emotions will bring me. I definitely hope against a repeat of the past.
Few more days of Recess week and 1 more PAPA show to go! After which life continues!